Practical Strategies

For those new to ADHD Partner blog and unfamiliar with my other two blogs, I’d like to point you to several helpful posts. After 10 years of moderating the online ADHD Partner group (an international free online group for the partners of adults with ADHD), I know these are “hot topics” and are bound to help you slow your own personal ADHD Roller Coaster. So, fire up your  monitor and find the clues you’ve been seeking:

ADHD and Sleep:

This is a topic I’ve educated about for years, and still many people (including clinicians) are surprised to learn that many ADHD symptoms conspire to impair good sleep–for your partner with ADHD and you.  Click here to read my post on this topic, “To Sleep, Perchance to Turn Off that *&$@# Computer.” Definitely read the many validating, illuminating comments (leave one to help others, if you  like).

Look forward to an e-book I’m writing on the topic, full of helpful sleeptime strategies!

ADHD and Sex:

Who knew? A “little kid’s disorder” that makes them “fidget in the classroom” can create problems with adult sexual intimacy, and indeed any type of intimacy? Read the rest of this entry »

One certain way to ease your stress is working with your ADHD partner to ease his or her stress.  For many of us, that means organization strategies that work for the entire household.

I’ve just spent my Sunday morning shopping on Amazon for helpful products to get you thinking in terms of external structural support for your partner with ADHD.  (See the “Get Organized” box to the left.)

You might do very well organizing your personal items in drawers and cabinets, but most adults with ADHD need visual storage systems  (otherwise, items out of sight are also out of mind).  If you want to avoid clutter but your ADHD partner needs visual cues, the compromise might be neatly contained but highly visible solutions.

For example, I found  handy devices for

• neatly storing electronic devices (complete with built-in chargers)
• finding the keys, wallet, eyeglasses, etc. (more about that exciting discovery below!)
• compactly storing garden tools (rakes, brooms, etc.)
• sorting mail
• remembering to take medication, and more

Look for my  personal picks  (many of which are mainstays in our house)  in the ”Get Organized” box to the left. Just click on a product to get more information; it won’t be added to your Amazon shopping cart unless you select it.

Finding the Lost Keys, Eyeglasses, Wallet, and More!

Given all the stories I’ve heard about missing-key trauma, it was particularly wonderful to discover a series of nifty devices for tracking down keys, eyeglasses, etc. Here’s the review one self-proclaimed adult with ADHD gave the  Find One Find All Key Finder, Wallet  Finder, Cell Phone Finder (but one variation of this gizmo):

As an adult ADHD’er, I’m constantly losing things; my doctor recommended I try out an item locator system. I purchased the FOFA, the EZ 2-Find and E-Z Find packs.I’ve been using the FOFA XD’s for a few months now, and have found it to be the best of all, with a few caveats. It ends up winning my vote, here’s my quick thoughts:

The Good:

• Can find any device as long as you have one of the others (no need to look for the remote control to your device finder in order to use it to find your TV remote control).
• Pretty easy to use & program once you get the hang of it.
• Multiple devices are easy to add and configure in groups, etc.

The not so good (really my only gripe):
The keypads on the devices feel rather flimsy, and I’m not sure how long they might last.

In conclusion: Even though the remote controls feel flimsy, I’m thinking about buying a few more. I gave up on the others as I lost the remote all the time. I’d definitely give a five-star rating if it weren’t for the flimsy keypads.

But maybe your partner has no trouble finding the keys. Your partner’s problem is remembering to charge the cell phone.  Or keeping the tools organized (instead of sitting out in the yard growing rust).  Or finding the all-important proof of insurance and registration when pulled over for a traffic stop. Or. Or. You’ll find solutions in the Get Organized! ADHD Partner Store.

I welcome your suggestions for items  that you and your partner have found helpful! Please just scroll down to leave a comment.  (It’s easy. No registration necessary.)

Gina

Michele Novotni, psychologist, coach, and ADHD expert

Psychologist, coach, and ADHD expert Michele Novotni is the author of What  Does Everybody Else Know That I Don’t?: Social Skills Help for Adults with Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder.

Below, she offers this simple  advice for you and your ADHD partner to start establishing priorities about tasks and chores:

“I want my husband to understand that I don’t do it on purpose. He thinks that I ‘forget’ to close the cabinets or ‘forget’ to put something away on purpose.”

Ginny, a client in my group for adults with ADHD, was sharing her frustrations over living with a husband who doesn’t have ADHD.  Her ADHD-specific need for relationship advice is common, especially when it comes to domestic tasks. Read the rest of this entry »